When we visited Saint Louis a few weeks ago, the Relief Society lesson at church felt like it was meant just for me! So often, I find myself awake at night thinking of all the awful things that can potentially happen to my children. It got the point that for a while I dreaded going to bed because that was all I could think about. Obviously this is not a pleasant way to live! And I feel this is one way I can allow myself to be distracted from good things and in a constant "state of bothered" if I allow these thoughts to overtake me. I think as a parent we're given the Spirit to help us keep our children safe, and I feel like this ability, for lack of a better word, to anticipate harm that might come to my children and do things like make sure there's no plastic around for youngest to choke on or strings from the blinds down to get strangled by, etc, is a God given thing, but I have to be careful not to allow fear to overcome faith. Faith that, even when bad things do happen, we are here on earth to learn and that ALL things will be for our good through our Savior. Sometimes that seems like such a trite thing to spout off but such a heavy thing, were it to be applied to, heaven forbid, the loss or "permanent" detriment of one of my children.
For this reason I wanted to record some of the woman's thoughts who shared the lesson, and some of my thoughts as I listened.
This was the lesson outline:
When I am feeling doubt and fear, I can have faith by REMEMBERING:
Satan is the author of fear 2 Timothy 1:7
My Father in Heaven is all-powerful 1 Nephi 17:31
I am a child of God Psalms 82:6
Jesus' sacrifice and Atonement were for me Doctrine and Covenants 50:41-42
The only things we should really fear are those things which can keep us from going where there is no fear.
-Neal a Maxwell
What an arsenal to have when I start to feel overcome with fear!
And two thoughts by President Hinckley
The church has a host of critics and an army of enemies. They mock that which is sacred. They demean and belittle that which has come from God...We are pained by the desecration of that which to us is holy. But we need not fear. This cause is greater than any man. It will outlast all its enemies. We need only go forward by the power of faith without fear. Said the Lord in an early season of this work: "Therefore, fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail."
Believe in yourselves and in your capacity to do something worthwhile. God has given you a mind and a spirit and a body with which to do your work. You have tremendous capacity. You do not have to be a genius to do something worthwhile in the world. The major work of the world is done by ordinary people who have learned to work in an extraordinary way. This is what makes the difference.
And the rest that jumped out at me:
Fear as defined in the bible dictionary means reverence, awe, worship, how we should stand in the presence of God versus fear as the world defines it, which is unworthy of a child of God, Adam's first emotion after the transgression
Fear is the antithesis of faith.
Fear isn't sin but mortal weakness.
Fear comes from the adversary.
Fears can include needing revelation but feeling uncertain, insecurities including how others view me, danger, death.
Why is it bad to let fear take over? Satan works on the natural man and doesn't want us to trust God and move forward in faith.
Partaking of the Sacrament will help me not feel fearful.
Get behind me Satan!
During the lesson I had the thought of Satan trying to weaken Joseph Smith before he had the First Vision. A friend of ours recently gave a talk and told about how right before she and her husband decided to get married they had a dark, dark feeling and realized it was Satan trying to stand in the way of what they could potentially become, together. After hearing their story, it reminded me how nervous, and occasionally downright badly Kevin and I felt during our engagement. Looking back I can see more clearly. See that Satan didn't want us working as a team, and I can see our potential. I think the same goes for raising my children. Satan doesn't want me to act. He wants me paralyzed by fear so I can't move forward with strength in teaching them the gospel because of the POWER OF THEIR POTENTIAL. For some reason, thinking about this helped me a lot!
The Lord to Moses: I made you! We have divinity within us! Because of that, we are not ALWAYS one way. We change, we stretch, we grow, we BECOME! I need to remember the pattern of my life. I've BEEN successful, and more importantly, sustained by God...in callings, in parenting, in being a wife...
I can't grow without spiritual pains! None of us can!
The Savior has suffered not just for our iniquities but also for the inequality, the unfairness, the pain, the anguish, and the emotional distresses that so frequently beset us. There is no physical pain, no anguish of soul, no suffering of spirit, no infirmity or weakness that you or I ever experience during our mortal journey that the Savior did not experience first. You and I in a moment of weakness may cry out, “No one understands. No one knows.” No human being, perhaps, knows. But the Son of God perfectly knows and understands, for He felt and bore our burdens before we ever did. And because He paid the ultimate price and bore that burden, He has perfect empathy and can extend to us His arm of mercy in so many phases of our life. He can reach out, touch, succor—literally run to us—and strengthen us to be more than we could ever be and help us to do that which we could never do through relying upon only our own power.
-Elder Bednar
